Mixed Emotions

As my third trimester progresses, there are many thoughts that cross my mind. How much more can my skin stretch? What do my toes look like? Will this baby be early or on time? What will this delivery be like?

There are days when I’m so tired of being pregnant. The days when I am in pain for the entire day or when I’m so short of breath that I can barely function. My most recent feeling was one of sadness. The midwife started giving me delivery info and signs of labor. I realized that my pregnancy is on the downswing now. I’m pretty sure I probably won’t be pregnant again after this one. So when I start thinking that I only have a handful of weeks left, I’m happy and sad.

Thoughts of postpartum depression and recovery after the delivery make me remember times past. But thankfully the overwhelming excitement of finally meeting this precious bundle who has been tap dancing on my bladder and distorting my stomach takes precedence. I can’t wait to hold her and kiss her and feed her. This is a new chapter. I’m looking forward to being restored. I thanks God for second chances.