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When Prayers Aren’t Enough

Since learning that my young nephew has cancer, I’ve experienced severe emotions. The first were shock and disbelief. At times I’ve been gripped by fear. I’ve also felt helpless. That one tends to linger. I’ve been praying like I’ve never prayed before, but sometimes it doesn’t seem like enough.

When I read posts from my sister-in-law and her pain is palpable, I feel helpless and sad. When I receive a text from my little brother about the intense sadness he sees in his only son, my heart breaks again and again. I want to make this go away. Prayer doesn’t feel like enough.

I am constantly encouraged by their strength and trust in God through this, but I wish this journey never had to begin. Why God? I look at my own children and have irrational thoughts. If you’re a parent, you know the responsibility we feel to protect our children from everything. We put a lot of faith in our ability to do so. When illness strikes, our resolve is tested. When we look in the mirror, we see frailty and weakness. Prayer doesn’t feel like enough.

His word tells us that His power is made perfect in our weakness. I guess that should be comforting, but someone it isn’t right now. I know it will be eventually. But right now, I don’t want to feel this sad. I want my nephew healed, and I want it right now. And I want to pray for God’s will, but I’m too afraid to do so. I believe in His power, but I don’t always understand it. I know that He is sovereign, and I know that I am weak right now. Lord, help me to trust in your perfect power. Help me to know that prayer is enough.

5 Comments

  • My life as a Home Engineer

    Beautiful sis! Keep praying God has already answered a few prayers for us, I actually talked to Sam after reading this to make sure he doesn't mind if I share them with you, I wanted to blog about them in greater detail but had to watch some of the things I said but I can't wait to tell you, I'll probably call you tomorrow evening. Love you

  • loriann12

    Stumbled upon this and get a look in from the outside. I'm a 5 year survivor of breast cancer. It's harder for the family than it is the person going through cancer. My father is going through prostate cancer right now, but I think seeing one of my children would be unbearable. My prayers are with your nephew, even though I don't know your family. Sometimes God keeps us from the storm, and sometimes he keeps us THROUGH the storm. God bless and keep.

  • RRR

    God dont need us , we need him.. you should thank GOD, that your newphew is around familly, you should thank GOD that his dad at least able to cure him, you should thank GOD, that there is no criminal record against him for no crim he did, JUST coz of his nationality, you also thank GOD he is not the only financial supporter in his familly
    just Imagine this all happened yo your nephew